Prepare to transform your life into a purpose filled, happy, and abundant life.  What is written here are some initial steps you can take to begin a surefooted path towards a life better than you ever thought possible. This is the first in a series of posts. The time between posts is designed to give you time to do the exercises and experience the value.  If you have questions while going through the process feel free to reach out.  

As you begin this process you should view this as an experiment.  The reason I encourage you to view it as an experiment, is that there are so many voices out there willing to tell you exactly how to help yourself. This is not one of those voices.  I am not asking you to take my word for anything, because you already have everything you need to turn your life around.  What I am asking you to do is explore yourself, and begin to see your own individual path.  No one can tell you the right way forward for you.  Everyone’s journey and starting points are so different, that there is no such thing as a one size fits all solution. One of the biggest benefits of going through this process will be the clarity you gain in your own life.  We like to think we see things as they are, but you will soon discover how much more there is to see. It is time for me to quit talking and you to start discovering.

Self-Awareness

The first step towards a better life is to get an improved view of yourself and your current situation.  The first exercises in this experiment are around observing the present moment separately from your thoughts about the present moment. This will add an almost immediate depth to your understanding of your current situation, and provide clarity on your options moving forward.  The following exercise is best done first thing in the morning to begin your day. If you are like me when I first started this, you may have to wait until you’re fully awake.  When I would try to be mindful in the morning, all I wanted to do was go back to sleep.

10 Minute Mindfulness

The first exercise is to find a quiet comfortable place to sit.  Once seated take three to five long slow deep breaths, and just be completely focused on your breath. Then begin to just focus on your breath, noticing the natural rhythm.  As you do this you will probably notice thoughts starting to come up.  Your brain will begin to remind you what you have to do for the day, or ask questions like “why am I doing this?” It is natural to lose focus on your breath.  When you notice this happens just acknowledge the thought, and don’t add anymore thought to it.  Gently return your attention to your breath.  I want to reiterate that if you get caught up in thought, and have to constantly return your focus to the breath, that is the practice. It is completely normal.  What you are doing is training your mind to notice your thoughts.  For some people this can take a lifetime to master, but even then you are still getting the significant benefit of noticing the distraction of your thoughts, and training yourself to focus on the moment.  You will also become more aware of the types of thoughts you are thinking.  You can spend as much or as little time as you want with this exercise, but I recommend starting with doing it for ten minutes twice per day. 

Check-In

The second exercise is to pause several times a day for less than a minute to just notice your current situation and your thoughts about it. You can start by doing this right before breaks, lunch, or dinner.  Alternatively you can set an alert on your smartphone a few times per day.  When the pause begins, notice any thoughts you are having, and just notice your mood.  Notice how you are breathing.  Are you breaths quick and shallow, or slow and deep.  Overall just notice the reality of your present moment, without reacting to it. After thirty seconds or so, or whenever you are finished taking inventory of the moment, just take three long slow deep breaths and get on with your day.

What’s in the Task?

We all have daily chores and tasks.  Some we like and some we don’t.  Pick one of those tasks, and do it mindfully.  For me the first task I did this way was washing the dishes.  I used to say I hated washing the dishes, and now I don’t mind at all.  So if there is a task you don’t like to do this could be an opportunity for you to find life a little more agreeable.  

The exercise is simple.  Pick the task that you normally do, and before you start on it take a few deep breaths, and determine to do the task mindfully.  As you perform the task, notice each step.  For example if you are doing the dishes, notice the temperature of the water, and notice the food particles falling away from the dishes.  When you notice yourself having the thought or feelings about the tasks or get lost in other thoughts, just acknowledge the thoughts, and go back to focusing on all the details of the task. Do the task as if you are trying to find something you never noticed before, paying close attention to every move and motion.  When you are done with the task take a few long slow deep breaths, and get on with your day.

The purpose of this exercise is very similar to the other two.  It allows you to focus on the present moment, and notice what you are thinking. You can do it daily or just a couple times weekly.  

Summary

If you really start to get benefit from the exercises you will be tempted to spend excessive amounts of time on them. You are probably an over achiever, and I reccommend that at least to start, you limit total daily time invested to 30-40 minutes. There will be some who just don’t quite relate, and will be tempted to drop it. Please don’t do this, for some this process will take time but I promise the benefit is worth it.

In all of the above exercises you were asked at some point to take long slow deep breaths.  The reason for this is that long slow deep breaths will calm your parasympathetic nervous system, and help your mind and body to relax.  For some people this benefit alone can have a life-changing impact. The other theme was to notice your thoughts.  We naturally think we know everything we are thinking, but the truth is that over 90% of your thoughts are not voluntary, and of those most go unnoticed by our conscious mind.  This is a well documented fact that neuroscientists are well aware of.  These exercises will make you aware of more of your thoughts. These two benefits and the exercises above made my life 100% percent better.  At least 30% of that improvement came within the first 30 days. In the beginning of this post I mentioned how different each of our starting points and situations are, and I stick by that.  But the reality that we are rarely as conscious as we think we are is a universal truth that applies to at least 99% of people. Improving discipline requires you to be mindful of your current behaviors, which these exercises will help greatly with. 

In the next post in the series, I will introduce you to your autopilot.  You will learn to take a lot of the struggle out of progress.  The real world requires work to get results, but that work doesn’t have to be such a struggle.