Material success does not create happiness, but happiness is a great platform for success.  Most of us set out to achieve our goals, because we think they will bring happiness, and security.  We have it backwards.  The first order of business is happiness and acceptance of reality. Those two things will provide a much better platform for success than an unhappy person’s list of goals.  

Instead of beginning your success journey with a list of goals, start by realizing and getting what is really holding you back under control.  The number one reason for failure is by far is letting our thoughts lead us to do or not to do things.  Think about someone who has committed to physical fitness, and has set a goal to go to the gym at least three times a week. Things were crazy for them at work on the day before they were to go to the gym. They get in late from work and couldn’t sleep because of the stress.  Their alarm goes off at 5AM so they can go to the gym.  There is no willing thought that comes up when the alarm goes off.  Their mind immediately starts negotiating with them about how they can stay in bed, and just go to the gym tomorrow instead of going now.  Eventually the thought wins and they miss their first morning trip to the gym.  These are the kinds of thoughts that stop us.  They come up when things get tough, or the excitement of a new goal subsides.  So how do you ensure this doesn’t happen to you?

The first step I call practical mindfulness.  Part of a sitting mindfulness practice is learning to relax, focus on your breath, or some other anchor.  When you notice thoughts come up just acknowledge them without adding any more thought to them, and go back to focusing on your anchor.  This practice over a period of time will help to learn to notice those thoughts that happen at 5AM when your alarm goes off.  You can learn to acknowledge the thought, not add anymore thought to it, and get up and go to the gym.  Most people have learned to identify themselves with the thoughts they have instead of identifying themselves as the incredible human beings they are. I teach people how to bring that mindfulness practice into the daily lives, and how to overcome those autonomous thoughts that are the number one reason for failure.  

We are able to overcome self sabotage by:

1. Realizing the truth that we are not our thoughts, our past, or how we feel.  We are something much more amazing. 
2. Use sitting and other daily mindfulness practices to create distance between an event and our reaction to it. 
3. Learn to love and accept ourselves. 

The good news is that if you don’t want to, or are not able to spend the money on life and mindfulness coaching, there are many great resources that will help you understand and implement this mindfulness in your own life.  Below I have included a few of the sources of information that I credit for helping me learn how to transform my life.  

1. Eckhart Tolle – “A New Earth” – Amazon
2. Michael Singer – “Untethered Soul” – Amazon
3. Michael Singer – “Surrender Experiment” – Amazon
4. Adyashanti – “Falling Into Grace” – Amazon
5. Peter Crone – Website (“Also checkout as many of his longform Youtube interviews as you can”)

Once you are able to quiet your mind, and more easily create that distance between the things that happen in your world and your response to them your life will change, and you will be ready to successfully pursue your goals.  I also want to give credit to a book I read long ago that made me realize the need to create distance between stimulus and response. 

Dr. Stephen Covey – “The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People” – Amazon
If you are interested in a life coaching session please you can email me at bpinkston@brentpinkston.com or leave me a message here.